So two of my offspring are discussing the kind of mileage a certain vehicle gets.
Then the elder of the two says, “But if you drove like Dad, you would get better mileage.” (Something along those lines, if that isn’t an exact quote.)
My typical driving patterns and pace almost certainly take me further per tablespoon of fuel than theirs does them.
But what other ways might so grand a statement end?
“But if you drove like Dad, your brakes and rotors would last longer.”
“But if you drove like Dad, you would be far less likely to get pulled over.”
“But if you drove like Dad, you could own your vehicles as long as he owns his.”
Hmmm. Not bad. And I’m sure I could conjure up (or even merely conjure) a few more. But I’ll quit.
“But if you drove like Dad, you would fall asleep at the wheel out of sheer boredom.”
Oh, yeah? Whatever. 🙄
But how about if you drove like…uh…well, like this: