Wanted: Close Friends

I didn’t write any of this post just now. This first block I wrote almost nine years ago in the Fall of 1999.

“After six years away, we aren’t sure we want to return to our home congregation. The close friends we had there have all left.” Though I could understand the comment and sentiment well, and could even empathize with it, I was still cut. You see, I was one of those who was still in their home congregation. Their feelings left me feeling out in the cold. It seemed I didn’t count as a friend or even as a potential friend.

“I hope you don’t decide to leave. If you do, we will have no real friends left here.” The comment warmed my heart at the same time it made my heart sink. It seemed that I had allowed our good friendship to warp our friends socially. It seemed that in their estimation, no one else counted as a friend or even as a potential friend.

Have our congregations turned into ice cube trays with the cubes representing individual friendships that have little in common with each other? I hope not! Actually, I’m sure that they haven’t, but the previous two paragraphs ought to serve as a warning to us. We Christians must be experts at developing new friendships, even close friendships, especially within our local congregations!

Three of my good friends left. One went to the Caribbean, another to Latin America, and the other to the world. Sometimes I feel as though I have good friends at church, but no more real confidants. The strange thing is, I can so easily blame the church. You know, it just isn’t as warm and friendly as it used to be. Indeed. If I am part of the church and I am not establishing new close friendships, then, yes, the church isn’t as warm and friendly as it used to be. And guess who’s partly to blame! Me!

This next block I wrote even longer ago — Summer 1995.

Who in your Sunday School class will walk with you? With whom will you walk? Will anyone walk with you? Will you walk with anyone? You need someone to walk with you, especially during those difficult, perplexing times. And the person next to you or across from you has the same need. Why go it alone? Walk with someone!

“A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity” (Proverbs 17:17).

“A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24).

“Woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up” (Ecclesiastes 4:10).

And this last block I wrote more recently (February 2003).

“Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do” (1 Thessalonians 5:11).

Be an active, responsible, accountable member of a faithful congregation. Within that local body of believers, be an encourager and a builder in the lives of the others. God will use them to encourage and build in your life.

I originally wrote the preceding blocks for Christian Light Publication’s youth Sunday School quarterlies.

1 thought on “Wanted: Close Friends”

  1. Your thoughts on friendship within the Body of Christ parallel my own in many ways. This topic still troubles and challenges me today. God bless you…my friend!

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